For years, people used to say that my sister and I resembled Mummy far more than Daddy, and my brother resembled Daddy much more than Mummy. And for years, I agreed. But after looking at pictures of him from both past and present, I was completely off. I did resemble Daddy a great deal more than I thought.
I think my judgement was colored by the last 13+ years when Daddy was sick and had lost the ability to find happiness in his day-to-day life.
I just couldn't see myself in my dad.
But looking at pictures of him when we were young kids showed a man who was filled with joy, a man who really enjoyed life. And I had forgotten his pure, unadulterated smile that could light up a room. And coming from a guy whose nickname growing up was "Smiley" (thank Mina Aunty and family for the name 🙂), I know a thing or two about smiles.
And I know his smile well because his smile is MY smile. I smile like Daddy, and I just now realized it. With this realization, I know now that by smiling, I bring a part of Daddy back into the world.
And so the best way to show how much I miss him is not by being sad, but by smiling each and every day.